Everyday life – restlessness
I’m more stressed and restless. The feeling of social isolation is stronger than ever, and I’m more sad. It’s not depression, because I am able to initiate things and engage in activities that are good to me. The positive experiences about my body’s reactions to physical exercises this summer came at a good time, because up here in the north, the autumn is generally a rough time because it’s get much darker so quick, and thus it’s important to be in a good physical condition in order to avoid Seasonal Affective Disorder (S.A.D) which I had to some extent during my early adult life.
Training in the swimming pool will give me a positive reaction this autumn and winter, I’m sure. Hopefully the stress will be reduced and I’ll be able to relax properly again.
Lost love is one part of the rough spot that I’m living right now. The other part is that earlier this summer, I had great anticipations about getting really close to my turn at the operating table for the CI. Not so. As things have turned out, the budget cuts at Rikshospitalet that I wrote about here earlier has slowed down everything. Instead of operating according the what the Norwegian Health minister ordered (at least two operations a week), the speed slowed down to one operation a week. So current status to my operation is that I can expect something to happen next year around summertime… One whole year more than I thought my worst case scenario would be when I started this blog… It takes some time to wrap my head around this. And it takes a whole lot of effort to not go negative about this, too. I do my best.
I have patience…
“Wait in the power of knowing what is possible…. Do not waver…. Remain steady… Remain true to your goals and allow life to carry you. That which is worthwhile is sometimes created slowly.”